Fire Licking at My Heels

This season of my life has not been an easy adjustment. 

When I moved here – and married my wonderful Knight in Shining Armor   it was an adjustment – wasn’t always easy but it was always fun!

But now, this season is not what I wanted at all yet here I am in new territory again. Only this time it’s not fun.

I have been feeling just like this: cold, barren, tangled, confused.

My calendar has been FULL and when it isn’t full, I make things up to do.

For those of you, my readers, that know me, you know this is not me at all. I am a homebody. I love being at home. Being at home is how I thrive! Confusion – well, it just confuses me!!

I don’t know if I have been at home – by myself for a complete day since Randy died. 

This week, it caught up with me physically. It had already been wearing on me emotionally and mentally. I have been on that depression roller coaster – good one day, bad the next, the up and down and sometimes upside down.

I have a propensity for pneumonia. So when I start wheezing, I KNOW WHAT I NEED TO DO.

Wednesday evening I could barely breath. So, that was it for me. I took care of the one study I was doing with friends on Thursday and then went to bed.

Friday I stayed in bed all day. I read a book. A trivial book. Pure fiction.  The first complete book I’ve read since Randy died. (except for study books)

I feel better.. physically, emotionally and mentally. I do realize that it’s not over. I am pretty sure I will be paying my quarter (that dates me for sure!) to ride on that roller coaster again. But today. I am on solid ground.

I had been running to and fro as if fire were licking at my heels. I never slowed down enough to let God calm me or console me.

I have learned another life lesson.

Be Still and Know That

I Am God.

Which Jesus Do You Follow?

I have heard said, “God is a loving God, He would never send someone to hell.”

Is this the God you follow? The Jesus you know?

A Jesus. A God who is loving and kind and a God who would never send someone to hell would never judge because he is so loving….

We have turned God into a “loving” God only. We’ve taken away the justice of God. The jealous God. The God that requires ALL of us. We have turned that God away from our:

• Our politics – our government
• Our religion
• Our quality of life
• Our sexual identity
• Our very breath

God warns His people. He gives us directives to live by. But we pick and choose. We read that book and choose what we want to live with and ignore the other parts -  it is more comfortable to  for us.

How do you look at the Bible? 

• Promises?
• Prophesies?
• Teachings?
• Stories?
• Warnings?
• God’s Word as a whole complete book? As His infallible Word?

In only presenting God as love, we remove all fear of Him. We remove all Accountability. We present only a part of Him.

In a world that abuses love in every way:

• By throwing it away
• By perverting it into any “thing” we want it to be for pleasing self
• By believing love is only sex

And then we present God as only a “Loving God” – so what is to be expected? We turn a “loving god” into anyone – into anything we want him to be. Then God becomes as perverted as our beliefs on love are.

We must present Jesus as our only answer and present Him in the Truth as it stands –  in the Bible.

To think His Word has changed throughout the years is not correct. It stood firm when He wrote it through men and it stands firm today.

 

2 Timothy 3:16 NIV

All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness.

The Plumb Line of Jesus

In my twitter feed on September 24th, I read two tweets – back to back by two different people:

“You must stop talking about the problem and start talking about the solution… Start speaking words of victory.”

Women of Christ

“In a world filled with problems, He provides the answer. His name is Jesus.”

Liz Curtis Higgs

As simplistic as that sounds, it is complete truth. 

Jesus is our only answer.  Our Nation, our people, even many of our churches have turned their backs on Him.

We’ve turned our backs on Him and then  are disgusted, saddened, sickened, devastated by the news we hear daily. School killings, Pastors in prisons, human trafficking, need I go on?

When the simple answer is Jesus.

Have we strayed too far?

Can our world, our country, our lives ever be brought back to the

plumb line of Jesus?

"And the Beat Goes On"

Admit it, you sang that, didn’t you??

I have gone to movies, gone out to eat, gone all sorts of places by myself over the years.

But, I haven’t gone out to eat by myself since Randy died. I mean to a real sit down restaurant. – Until tonight.

I went to Oklahoma today (September 30), visited my Dad, visited the cemetery and on my way home I decided I was hungry for breakfast. You know, those Village Inn breakfasts!! (without even realizing that today was FREE PIE DAY!!! BoNuS!)

So I went to eat by myself. At suppertime. On free pie night. The place was packed. I didn’t get a “private” out of the way booth. Or even one of those 2 seater booths they have. Nope. I got a table for 4 right in the middle of all the other tables for 4!

But think about it. This was restaurant heaven for me because I am a certified, card carrying, people watcher.

What an interesting meal. At the table to the left of me – and up one were 2 girls that I decided must be sisters. They look alike, they have matching tattoos and they interact like sisters. They each have a little girl close  in age.

One is bad. :)  One is good. How fun it was to watch this meal unfold. One kept screaming. Then she kept throwing her cup at to the man at the table next to them. It became interesting watching the face of the mom of the “good girl.” You know, that look of "Hmm, look how wonderful my daughter is!" You know the look. You’ve probably gotten that look before! You’ve probably GIVEN that look before!!!  The"OH MY, my daughter will NEVER act like that!!!" look!   Very proud and a smidgen of disdain!!

Then on the other side of me and up one table was a man and his wife. Older couple. - Older than me. And she was very upset. Someone had made her mad. She went on and on and on and on some more. I could hear “she…... then she…… and then she….” For at least half of their meal. She was disgusted with “she.”  She was irritated with "she."  He didn't say much but continued eating. He smiled at her, nodded once in a while. After a while, she looked at him and smiled. All was good in her world again. All she needed was someone to listen!

There were many more stories unfolding around me but you get the picture!

It was fun. No one even noticed me. Even as I plainly stared watched, no one made eye contact with me. They were all existing in their own worlds.

as Sonny and Cher would say:

"And the beat goes on."

Life goes on. Even if when you are alone.